This Will Destroy you
by Jeebas
Summary: Bigby tells his version of the tale Red Riding Hood to Snow.


Disclaimer ~ Jeebas would love to own DCs Fables and The Wolf Among Us but sadly doesn't. I also don't own any of the songs that I name my fics after either (If you noticed Chris Garneau!)

A/N: Sorry about the other fic I've been ignoring (I swear I have actually started the next chapter). I love this comic and game to pieces and it has taken over my astounding 4 year obsession with Death Note. Is it a good thing? Bad thing? I don't know! Fortunately you can tell me in your reviews!

I haven't been myself lately. Or what is normal for me, so sorry if this is a bit cold? Disheartening? Distant? I have yet to remember the word that's perched under my chin to regard it as such. Also some bits were rushed. Please tell me if they are and I will sort them out.

Chapter 1 – I have two shadows.

Days rolled onto weeks, weeks rolled onto months, months rolled onto years and years rolled onto decades. You would think you would notice the vast amount of time like this passing, but fortunately for Bigby's sanity he doesn't. It goes past in a blur, and being able to pick out a moment of his life as crystal clear as if it were just happening within that expanse of life while not being able to notice it flash past your eyes as quick as lightening is rewarding. For Bigby's sake, he calls it that. Yet the moments in history where evolution seemed to renew itself never seemed to stand out. Probably because he spent most of his past as a beast who would have nothing to do with human laws or necessities or technology. In some aspects he hasn't changed, not that he likes to think that. It's sort of a work in progress. Despite all that Bigby's doing to change himself and redeem his reputation among Fabletown, his less than admiral past sets himself back quite a bit.

Snow never asks about those days. They both know it would do good if they sat down and discussed it, and they both know that it's what Bigby wants to do, and Snow knows that a small part of her is yearning for it. Bigby willingly telling her what happened all that long ago would take a significant amount of trust that she wants him to have in her. Showing her that after all these years, the countless decades that have passed, their time together means something to him. Although, there's a small voice that speaks out to her when Bigby displays his animalistic tendencies that maybe she's expecting too much of him. The way he treats everyone else around him is a clear indication of how little he cares and takes into regard of what people expect out of him. Snow can see the greater meaning behind his actions and how deeply affected Bigby is by what has happened.

And that's why when Snow left her flat in the evening of a warm summer's day, quickly deciding it was still too sweltering to be wearing a jacket upon arriving to Bigby's apartment, she was surprised when a pig nudged open the peeling remains of a mediocrely painted door after she had been in between her 4th and 5th set of knocks instead of Bigby. She wasn't too surprised not to see him here, since she'd been in the stingy office all day with Bufkin and every so often Ichabod peering over her shoulder to rudely commentate her work in that slimy tone of his, and hadn't seen nor sight or sound of him and took it as a good thing that maybe be was resting or dare she say it, 'taking it easy'.

"Who are you? Here for Bigby?" The rough voice of the pig tore Snow from her thoughts, _enabling_ her to acknowledge the radiating heat seeping out from inside the apartment.

"Snow White. You? Yeah, is he in?"

"Ah. Colin. He's mentioned you a few times. S'nice to see you in person. You're lucky, he's just got in." Colin grunted and pushed the door aside, welcoming Snow in.

"That's interesting to know." Snow gaze left the pig and searched around from what she could see. The apartment was relatively small, with the bare necessities and a strong scent of the shitty brand she always saw Bigby have in his pocket lingering heavily.

"I hope you didn't take that the wrong way, Snow. Nothing bad has been spoken about you coming from myself." Bigby's growl of a voice travelled from the door frame of the kitchen to the main room as he entered.

Snow immediately halted her look and laid her eyes upon the window, caught by the ominous glow of the flickering street lamp illuminating the block pathway.

"Of course. I would never think it was of ill intent anyway."

A faint smile washed over Bigby's face for a brief moment as he settled by Snow.

"So… What brings you here?"

"Nothing much really." _Hmmm? _Bigby frowned, running his hand over his mouth and stubble in confusion.

Snow finally found what she was looking for, albeit unknowingly. The steady clicking of her bold red heels halted at the coarse looking chest of drawers and her hand skimmed over the top of a yellowed newspaper clipping.

"Did you know her?"

"Who?"

"Red Riding Hood."

"I was wondering how long it would take you to come inquiring about that. I'm honestly surprised it took you this long. You deserve to know. Although… I think it's not a very good idea. "

Snow raised her eyebrow and tucked a strand of loose curled jet black hair behind her ear.

"Bigby, I think it would give both of us the peace of mind if you told me what happened. I know what you are. I am not holding a grudge against you for your past, nor am I frightened by it."

"I- I know, Snow. That's not what I'm particularly bothered about." He sighed, gathering up what he had left to finish. "… That's not why I restrain myself from talking about it. You see… If I do, I think about her. As much as I'd like to admit I'm not the same animal as I was in the past, I don't think it would take much for me to get distracted. I don't want to! But it's really quite difficult repressing the thoughts constantly."

"I am not afraid. I know the willpower you have is enough."

'_I am not afraid…' _Bigby's figure shrank as he finally retreated back into his mind. He could picture the dainty baby pink lips muttering the exact phrase moments before her death. It was meaningless to him, yet encouraged him enough to end it there.

"That's what they all say. Including her. With her flowing glossy black hair escaping the hood that enveloped her head, her softly paled skin and deep mahogany eyes. The memory in which I see her before me is still as fresh as a daisy and thrives on tormenting me with the sweet smell of her innocence and purity.

"Dammit Snow… I am a monster. _She was only a child! _I deserved what I got. The pain I am feeling now will never be enough and nothing ever will. Hell is the only place for me and the crimes I've done. _Hell!_"

Snow's saddened expression deepened at Bigby's sorrow, relenting to interrupt him. She folded her arms across her flowered blouse, the sour expression and pose making it clear she didn't agree with him.

"The worst thing is that I enjoyed what I did. It was the most thrilling experiences of my life. Seeing the life fade out of her bright eyes was more of a kick than seeing it in a dirty criminal's..."

He stuttered the last sentence out, mulling around whether he should say it as he ran his hand through his rough brown hair and brought it back down to rest on his waist, crinkling his shirt. Bigby did, quiet enough so he would've hoped Snow would've thought she mistook him.

"… And I would've gladly done it again."


End file.
